ODE TO A LOST ETX Last updated: 21 February 2001

The ETX Song

[With absolutely no permission and only the faintest of nods to Jacqueline Steiner and Bess Hawes, who wrote The MTA Song, to say nothing of... Nick! Bob! John! The Kingston Trio!!]

(Spoken: "This is the story of a man who shipped a telescope to Meade and who, for the want of the correct ZIPcode, found his telescope returned to Memphis, TN instead of Seattle, WA.

"Citizens! Hear me out! This... Could... Happen... To... You...!")

G                                  C
Now let me tell you the story of a man named Richard

     G                  D7
On a tragic and fateful day.

       G                                C
He put his ETX in a package, wrapped it very tightly

            D7          G
And sent it to Meade in C A.



Chorus:

G                                 C
Well, did it ever return?  No, it never returned,

        G               D7 
And its fate is still unlearned.

       G                   C
It may ride forever in the UPS system.

         G        D7      G
It's the ETX that never returned.



Richard handed in his package at the loading dock door

And he watched it drive away.

And sometime later the computer said it went to Memphis;

Richard couldn't get back that ETX.


Chorus


Now all night long Richard writes his e-mail

Crying, "what will become of it?

How can I ever hope to see my stars and planets

Or the neb'la called M Four Two?"


Chorus


Richard's life is going down to the UPS web site

Each and ev'ry night.

And through the open window he types the tracking number

As the data goes streaming through.


Chorus


Now you viewers of Weasner's web site, don't you think it's a scandal

How delivery's been delayed and delayed?

Fight the messed up shipping; yell at U P S trucks

To get the scope back today!


Chorus

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